dear me

love [edited]
1:38 a.m. on 2005-08-10

Haha. Happy birthday Singapore!
Went over to my aunt’s house halfway through ndp because we can watch the fireworks from her house. Nice (:

Indeed, we’ve come a long way.
Happy to hear that the gov’s placing emphasis on the current ‘worldwide trend’ of widening income gap. And of course, other matters.

The bombings in London did set me thinking. And sadly, I believe that one day we’ll be the target. We can prepare for it, even prevent it, albeit to a certain extent, but when it comes, it comes. It’s a matter of when, and how.

When you think about it, it’s so real. Singapore’s really a nice place to live in. For the majority of Singaporeans, we lead sheltered lives; have most things we require to live comfortably, have education, and of course, we’re exposed to a multiracial, caring society. [as demonstrated by how people donated to the psc after the nkf saga]

I’ve been thinking about this for quite a while. When it does happen, I wonder how we’ll react. London reacted well; the emergency help came fast, and they stayed united. So do we, I hope.

Anyway. As usual, during every 9th of August, we’re reminded of how far we’ve come, and yes, how patriotic we are. This year that fact actually registered into my mind while I sat in front of the screen; people were waving flags enthusiastically. The average Singaporean family, daddy mummy and little kid, all dressed in red, the kid with a [made in Singapore] tattoo on his/her face, the parents pointing things out. All waving happily at appropriate times.

Touching. Even if it’s a once-a-year scene.
I wonder how proud those soldiers feel when our president speaks to them.
How proud each performer was to be part of the celebrations.
How proud we are of these performers.
Of Singapore.

Mmm.

That aside, the celebrations in school we re rather fun. Poor people who planned the formation, it couldn’t take place because of the rain. Anyway, this year’s fashion parade was interesting haha. Of course, since we were involved (: and 204 totally rocks! =)

After that, went out for lunch and a .. dialogue session. Went to park mall to eat because ps was too crowded.. halfway through met wenyi and went to the magic shop. Cool the uncle showed us some tricks. (:

Saw Jason when he came to get his lunch. Hmmm. I’ve had a long history with MME and people.X) The person I rmb most vividly is Raymond, for some reason. They all come and go. But Jason looks to be staying permanently. –shrug- just as well. Shaun and him create a nice environment. I think its safe to conclude every one there is a joker.

I wish we could go back to last December. Last year.

The past three weeks has been.. I dunno.

Superficial.
Acting like an idiot, behaving like an idiot.

And returning home to feel lost.

I’m willing, I’m really willing, to put everything behind us.
If you could.

We’re just building a wall that’s higher and higher.
A wall which is slowly blocking out our communication system.
One that is cutting off our sense of logic.
One that forces us to deal with matters more emotionally than rationally.
One that is slowly killing us all.

What for?
Tinted glasses are hard to look through.
You have to squint, and even then you don’t get an accurate view.
Put them down.
Look,
Look at things without them
Look at things with sincerity in discovering
Look at things with your whole heart

And then you’ll discover
This wall was never meant to be
Never had to exist
Never had to be a threat to you

The glasses, the wall, all of these
Should never have been allowed to hurt us.

If it’s my fault, let it be.
Never hurt the innocent party.

Please.

I’m sorry if I’ve done anything wrong this period of time.
I’ve been terribly unreactive, I know.
And unfortunately, I was taking the cowardly way out.
By avoiding.

I’m avoiding anything that has to do with it.
I’m avoiding anything that threatens to break that dam.
Because
The water level is high.

And, unfortunately, that also includes you.

I’m fed up with the way things are going.
Trapped; it’s a standstill.
Not moving forward.
It is, however, balancing on an edge with a drop into eternity.

Anything, any slight mistake
Any misjudgement
And its bye
Forever.

I don’t want to get anyone else into trouble anymore.

I’m doing all this, for them
I’m pushing on, because of them
If I got them into this, I will get them out of it.
As best as I can.
I’m holding on, for them.
Just as its been all this while.

For you, I pray.
Go through with this.
Strong,
With your innocence.
Open,
with a forgiving heart.
Know,
That we care.
That,
We will be there.
Come what may.

believe in yourself
I believe in you.

And you.
Be strong.
You’ve come so far.
I’ve seen you grow
To who you are
To what you’ve become.
I know it’s hard
I know you’re thinking that no, I don’t understand
But realize,
That you’re not alone.
That someone cares.
Believe in yourself
Because,
That someone believes in you.

Stand tall, stand proud
Voices that care are crying out loud
And when you close your eyes tonight
Feel in your heart how our love burns bright.

With love,
From me to you.

<< || >>